“We need to leverage our Omnichannel Flux Capacitor Synergy Matrix to hyper-optimize holistic brand convergence.”
If that sounds like bullsh*t to you, congratulations—you’re on the right track. Marketing shouldn’t sound like a sci-fi fever dream or a never-ending TED Talk. Yet, too often, marketers (or people claiming to be marketers) hide behind jargon like this to sound impressive, rather than being transparent and actionable.
That’s why I made a video on how to spot real marketers and avoid getting duped by fancy-sounding nonsense. Check it out below:
Here’s what’s in the video if you’re more of a blog skimmer:
1. Good Marketing Is Simple
Real marketing pros can explain their strategies without turning it into a word salad. If they can’t tell you exactly what they’re doing and how it connects to your goals in plain English, that’s a problem.
Ask them:
- “What’s the goal of this strategy?”
- “How will this help us grow revenue (or achieve our key objective)?”
- “What did we learn from past campaigns that we’re using here?”
If they can’t answer clearly, you’ve got some flux capacitor-grade fluff on your hands.
2. Failure Isn’t a Bad Thing
The best marketers aren’t afraid to show their failures. In fact, they embrace them. Marketing is experimentation. Not every campaign will crush it, and that’s okay—if they’re learning and iterating.
But if every report claims 100% success on every KPI? Red flag. Either they’re not experimenting enough, or they’re cherry-picking data. You want someone who’s honest about what worked and what didn’t, because that’s how real progress happens.
3. KPIs Should Be Tied to Revenue
Key Performance Indicators (KPIs) can be powerful tools—when used correctly. But if someone throws a bunch of graphs and stats at you without explaining how they connect to your business goals, they’re probably just trying to impress you.
Focus on metrics that matter:
- Revenue impact: How does this campaign drive sales or conversions?
- Actionable insights: What can we do with this data?
Anything else is just noise.
4. Creativity + Flexibility = Results
Marketers love ideas. They’re wired to think creatively. But great marketers also know when to let go of ideas that aren’t working. This is where the phrase “murder your darlings” comes in.
It means you shouldn’t get emotionally attached to any single concept. Whether it’s your idea or theirs, if the data says it’s not working, it’s time to move on. Marketing should be about what works, not just what feels cool.
5. You Should Feel Involved
A great marketing relationship is a collaboration. You should feel comfortable asking questions, sharing feedback, and even challenging ideas. If your marketer makes you feel out of the loop—or like you don’t “get it”—they’re doing it wrong.
At the end of the day, marketing is about trust, transparency, and results. The best marketers will share their wins, their failures, and the data behind them, all while keeping things simple and actionable.
So, what’s the takeaway?
Skip the flux capacitor synergy nonsense and look for marketers who keep it real. When they focus on your goals, explain things clearly, and welcome collaboration, you know you’re working with someone worth your investment.